By John Reddin

Take out the garbage
Then clean up the yard
I can't do the mowing
For me it's too hard

I've food in the pots
But I can't find the lids
I've ironing to do
Then I'm washing the kids

Your mother is coming
She'll be here real soon
It's ten past eleven
She'll be here at noon

Start washing the car
And sweeping the drive
If It isn't all clean
She'll skin us alive

Stop reading the paper
And give me a hand
The dog's on the carpet.
He's covered in sand

The milk has gone sour
I must have some more
And please get some carrots
From up at the store

I'm getting real cranky
I'm in a right "Tiz"
And I cannot find
Where the Aspirin is.

Can you help me darling?
I'm not feeling well
I've got the "flu" coming
I'm feeling like hell

I'm having a shower
Then going to bed
When your mother comes
Tell the old bat I'm dead.